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Closet Clean Out

This was captioned: I got the better deal -- more material same price!

I attended the kids’ band concert last Thursday and ran into the lovely lady pictured with me at right. She let me know she still had the shirt she is wearing in the picture below and let me know I looked great and could fit into the smaller version of the shirt. She still owned it.

The picture was taken at our 20-year-class reunion. We live in the same small town where our shopping options are limited. We both had the same idea when we bought the shirt at Fashion Bug.

I no longer own my shirt. It is too big for me now that I’ve lost nearly 60 pounds. I donated it several months ago.

Today, in my bedroom, I have another very large bag of clothes to donate. I had been holding onto my size 18 pants because they were what I wore for work. But they were getting very baggy. The other day I realized I needed to stop wearing them when I was able to take the pants off without unzipping or unfastening them. Plus, they made my butt disappear.

It is now the end of the semester, which means I won’t be needing many dress clothes for an entire month. I decided it was time to bag up the baggy clothes and all of the size 18s are gone. So are the size 16s (well except for one pair that is pretty comfy).

I know that I am going to have to sort through my underwear drawer soon. I have bras that are too big (in the band and the cup) and some underwear too. I have read too many horror stories about underwear falling off to trust my larger stuff much longer.

I am now in size 14s, and I even bought a jean skirt to wear. It is a bit on the short side, so I’m going to have to invest in some leggings of some type as well. The skirt was at the Gap Outlet and on clearance plus 40 percent off, so I bought it for less than $3. How could I not?

There is a downside to being smaller. I live in a home with three teenage daughters. The youngest is still a small, but the two older girls wear medium sizes. I am a size large now, which means my clothing no longer swims on my children, and they are finding things they like. The other day my oldest arrived home and upon seeing what shirt I was wearing announced, “I was going to wear that.” It was mine.

I suspect it will only get worse when they start fitting into my pants as well.

And in good news — my middle daughter has a pair of black knee-high boots. I tried them on, and they fit my calves! The problem is she won’t let me borrow them. ;-)

Protecting Presents from Snooping Children

An Oldie but a Goodie: Mom (me) and Justin at a Christmas several years ago.

Driving to work this morning, I listened to Finster (of WKLT’s Omelette and Finster) complain about his stepkids snooping after his wife wrapped up presents and put them under the tree. Finster described a scene I was pretty familiar with — kids counting and shaking the various presents as they wonder what the packages might contain.

A woman caller suggested a fantastic strategy. Instead of putting the kids’ names on the packages, the caller said to use reindeer names. You don’t reveal which child is which reindeer until Christmas morning.

Tonight, I mentioned the idea to my husband, but my kids overheard. My son immediately decided it was a bad idea. He proclaimed that shaking the packages was part of the Christmas experience.

One of my daughters immediately called dibs on being Rudolph. When I suggested it would defeat the purpose if she knew the reindeer name I assigned to her packages, she proclaimed no one else should be Rudolph except for her.

Tonight, I wrapped a bunch of gifts.

(By the way, my son mentioned that Congress just recently passed a law that you MUST have a Christmas tree up and decorated once more than two presents have been wrapped. I’m sure we’ll all read the news reports about this new law soon.)

I refrained from using the kids’ names, and I used the reindeer names instead. Right now, we have presents for Dasher, Dancer, Vixen and Prancer.

The presents are not yet under our tree because we are in clear violation of the newly passed law. We are still without a tree. Instead of under a tree, the gifts are on top of the containers holding all of our Christmas tree ornaments and lights.

I think to completely mess with the kids, I will add more presents for Comet and Cupid, Donner and Blitzen. That’s right. I will assign TWO reindeer names to each kid, and they will be completely confused about who will receive what.

(Insert evil laugh!)

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New Family Photo

Sherwood Family 2011

This fall, we went out into the woods to get firewood. While we were there, I loved the way these beech trees sort of created a natural grandstand. I decided to take the family photo there.

In back we have Steve and Linda (me). In the front row, the children are arranged in birth order (L to R): Autumn (17), Amanda (16), Maxine (14) and Justin (12). Also pictured are two of our three dogs: Lily (the black minipin) and Zeus (the giant chocolate lab). Not pictured: Spike (the beagle) because he would have run away, and we didn’t want to lose him. :)

Picture Perfect?

Linda and Maxine in Washington DC, 2010I have love/hate thoughts about this picture. I love it because it is a picture of my youngest daughter, Maxine, and me during her school trip to Washington DC last year. I remember the moment the shutter was snapped, and we both have great smiles on our faces.

I hate the picture because my hair is flat and wind-blown; there are bags under my eyes, and I’m not wearing a spot of makeup. And in these days where most people sport blinding white teeth, my toothy smile reveals teeth that are slightly stained from my morning cup of coffee. Who am I kidding? CUPS of coffee. My daughter, by the way, looks gorgeous. I don’t see anything I’d change.

But would I be willing to touch up this photo? I know there isn’t much that can be done about my wind-blown hair. I have the software to smooth the bags and erase the smile lines around my eyes. I can clear up the blotches on my skin.

It won’t happen. I am keeping this photo as is because there is a story behind those bags, flat hair and make-up free face. As part of the trip, we slept (and I use the word “slept” very loosely because there wasn’t very much actual sleeping) on a bus, dressed for the day in a tiny bathroom in an over-crowded fast-food restaurant, walked through bitter cold and high winds miles to arrive where this photo was taken.

The photo reflects what happened that day, which is why I wouldn’t touch it up.

But not everyone feels this way. There was an article that I read recently that parents are paying to have their children’s school pictures touched up, and we aren’t talking about senior photos. This is being offered to elementary school students.

Really? We are expecting perfect photos of our kids?

In the article, one mom explains she opted to have her child’s photo touched up because the child had an outbreak of eczema.

So?

My daughter in that picture? We have a sports photo of her with a huge fat lip. Her sister, a teammate on her Little League team, had thrown a softball at her the day before pictures. In her individual photo, despite her fat lip, my daughter is smiling. The photo hints at a story, and it reminds of the event.

Years ago, in a crowded mall, my children sat on Santa Claus’ lap. One of them was screaming and crying, and her arms were stretched out to me, urging me to pick her up and take her away from this strange man. The photographer was trying to cajole her. I stopped the photographer, and I encouraged her to take the photo as is — screaming baby and all. It is a priceless memory that my kids still get a kick out of when it is put on display in our home every Christmas.

Imperfections aren’t something to hide or touch up. Sometimes the better story (and the better message to your children) is to show the flaws.

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Sun, Spring Break and Granny

After arriving home, all of their stuff landed on the kitchen table and overflowed onto the floor.

Over the last two days, three generations of the Sherwood family traveled north along I-75. In truth, the generations stretched cross four levels, but there was a generation missing from that vehicle, and it was this absence that I think makes this trip remarkable.

Last week, my two youngest daughters boarded a plane for the first time. They were anxious and a bit nervous about the plane trip. One of the girls had previously declared she would NEVER fly but had been wooed into the idea with the thoughts of warm weather and a spring break in Florida after a very long cold winter in Michigan.

They boarded the plan with their grandpa. That’s right. A 62-year-old man was accompanying a 15-year-old and a 13-year-old on a trip that would last at least a week. I’m not sure how he got talked into agreeing to that.

As the mother of those two girls, I wasn’t too worried. I knew they’d listen to their grandpa — probably better than they would have listened to their parents. I was more worried about how things would go once they arrived at their destination — a retirement community where their great-grandma spends the winters.

Granny, as I call her, has spent the last several winters in Fort Myers Beach, Florida. Her daughter owns a condo nearby and more recently a grandson has moved down their permanently. For as long as Granny has been going down there, she has been trying to convince her oldest son, my children’s grandfather, to visit her. He hasn’t been easy to convince. A week in Florida is not his idea of a relaxing vacation (although he might enjoy it if it was spent primarily on a fishing boat).

While Granny spends each winter in Florida and summer in Michigan, getting Granny back and forth between the two becomes a bit of a production. It is a complicated excursion, organized primarily by Granny’s oldest daughter. Who will drive Granny’s car? Because Granny must have her car. How will the sewing machine get there? Will everything fit in Granny’s car? Last winter, it even involved some northern Michigan neighbors, on their way to their own winter home, hauling and dropping off a golf cart. Granny uses a golf cart (rather than her car) to get around the retirement community where she lives.

Although the trio flew down to Florida, they would be heading back to Michigan in Granny’s car. My father-in-law would drive with his mother as a passenger and two granddaughters in the backseat along with Granny’s aging toy poodle. I’m not quite sure what to say about that dynamic. One of Granny’s daughters said she’d love to be a fly on the wall in that vehicle while another daughter responded, “I wouldn’t!” They are both probably right.

The trip ended, for my daughters, last night a little after midnight. My father-in-law helped them bring their stuff in, and he seemed to be in good spirits. That may have been because the trip was over. ;-) I have not yet heard everything about the trip. I am eager to hear the different takes from the various generations.

I have heard bits and pieces.

After a rather bumpy landing, while embarking from the airplane, my youngest daughter said loudly, “Grandpa, I’m never flying again!” which brought laughs from her fellow travelers.

The senior citizen that my oldest daughter first spotted two years ago appears to still be around and still creeping out the girls — apparently he wears a Speedo while swimming laps in the community pool.

Did I know that some places throw away their pop bottles instead of returning them for a deposit?

Did I hear they could have gone parasailing again since the company screwed up their pictures from the first time but didn’t get to because Grandpa wanted to get on the road?

Parasailing was awesome.

Although she didn’t see any, my youngest daughter is still proclaiming she swam with dolphins because she went swimming in the Gulf of Mexico.

And if you call the Gulf of Mexico the ocean, Granny will correct you. It’s the gulf not the ocean.

Salt water doesn’t taste good.

Whenever Granny asked the girls to do anything, Maxine volunteered before Amanda had a chance to even open her mouth.

About spending two days in the back seat with your sister: she kept touching me. She also apparently kept stealing my phone and taking pictures of me. (And I don’t have to identify “she” here since they both made the same claims.)

Granny told them to knock it off at least once. (I think that number is low.)

My girls were the whitest people there right up until they became the reddest.

People kept telling my daughter, “Wow, you are really burned.” She didn’t think they needed to tell her that. She knew.

The girls? They are really burned. Ouch.

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