I’ll Strip For That

The scale hates me. It refuses to show me anything that does not start with the number 2 even when what starts with a 1 is just ounces away.

As a result, I have been trying to avoid the scale. I am not good at avoiding the scale. But I am delaying scale gratification.

For instance, in the past, I would wake up, use the bathroom and then step on my scale naked. This would happen almost immediately after I woke up.

Now, I avoid the scale for minutes, and even up to an hour at a time.

Instead of climbing onto the scale naked, I step on it with my clothes. Of course, I do this with my old scale not my new scale. My new scale (pictured at right) keeps track of things besides my weight, so I don’t want to mess up my readings by wearing clothes.

This morning I waited almost an hour and a half before I gave in and stepped onto the scale. The results were so promising (and by promising, realize that the results looked like if I stripped off my clothes, I might finally see a weight that starts with 1), that I didn’t hesitate in stripping off my clothes.

I reset the scale and stepped back on. I waited for the results to show up.

And about  kicked the thing when the scale said the exact same weight for me naked as I was when I was wearing clothes. I don’t think that’s right.

I reset the scale again, and I once again stepped on. It didn’t even show a one-pound loss. Normally, the clothes I was wearing would mean a 2-pound loss.

It was then I realized my old scale was probably feeling neglected and upset about the new scale. Plus, it must totally be doing crack.

I gave up and went to see the new scale since I was already naked. Plus, the new scale has more accurate numbers (.2 instead of .5). It did say I weighed less  than the old scale, but it wasn’t that big of a difference and still neglected to have a 1 in front of the number.

So there was no satisfaction this morning in my latest war with the scale, but I learned exactly what it is that will make me want to strip at a moment’s notice even when my hubby isn’t around.