My middle daughter hates being late to anything. She is pretty demanding about being on time. In the morning, she is the one that keeps everyone on schedule. As the time nears for everyone to leave, she starts calling out the time.
She gives warnings: 10 minutes, 5 minutes, time to go.
And her “time to go,” is earlier than what her siblings think should be the “time to go.” She allows time for everyone to put on their coats, grab their bags, handle any last minute panic moments, walk to the end of the driveway and have a couple of minutes to wait until the bus actually arrives.
Her older sister is the exact opposite. She ignores the warnings her sister gives her about the time. She milks out every single second she can use and often runs for the waiting bus while still putting on her shoes or her coat. This morning she was going to catch the bus with mascara still on her forehead. Her friends, she claimed, would help her.
She opened the front door, looked out and saw the bus wasn’t there yet, so she closed the door and made her way back to the bathroom to fix the mascara.
When I was younger, I was late for almost everything. In high school, it was usually because my friends took a long time getting ready. I would be ready way before they were,and I would wait. After high school, I usually blamed my lateness on my children. It took a LOT of effort to get four children ready and out the door by a certain time.
I distinctly remember one time I was returning to work after having a baby. It was my first day back, and I was ready. I was dressed up with makeup on and hair looking nice. The baby was dressed and ready. And I picked her up and grabbed my stuff and the diaper bag and was just heading out the front door when she puked all over me.
Needless to say, I had to put everything back down and change both of our clothes as well as do some cleaning up. How can being late be my fault that day?
I also live far away from everything, and I tend to underestimate how long it will take me to get from point A to point B. I usually know how long it takes. For instance, it is a 10 minute drive from my house to US 27. It used to take me 30 minutes to go from my house to work in Grayling.
What my time estimates fail to consider, however, are intervening circumstances. On a good day, with no traffic, deer, construction or weather problems, I can drive from my house to Grayling in 30 minutes. But it is the rare day when everything aligns to allow that time frame. And yet, I consistently plan to go to Grayling with only 30 minutes of time available.
Plus, I do stupid things. I can’t just get ready and leave the house. I also feel like this is the perfect time to do laundry or pick up things that are in the wrong place. I like coming home to a clean house, so I try to clean it before I leave. I should be getting ready instead of cleaning.
I am trying to change. I am trying to be more like my middle daughter and less like me. For the most part, I have succeeded. But once you have been labeled as being perpetually late, no one notices you have changed. What they notice is when you screw up and are late again.
One way I am changing is trying to leave early enough to allow me time for things I can’t control. I am trying to change my “30 minutes to Grayling” mindset to “45 minutes to Grayling.”
For instance, it takes me 1 hour and 15 minutes from the time I walk out of my house and drive to Ferris, park my car and walk to my office and unlock it. I try to be in my office by 8 a.m., and to do this, I usually leave between 6:30 and 6:40 a.m. This gives me between 5 to 15 minutes of extra time.
I also try to do other things to help me stay on time. Although I arrive at Ferris at 8 a.m., my first class isn’t until 9:30 a.m. This way I have plenty of time to get to my class on time.
Yesterday, my husband asked me if I had watched Everybody Loves Raymond. Ray was apparently complaining about his wife’s tendency to be late. She wanted to know why he was complaining when she had been that way for 15 years. His response, “After 15 years, I thought you would have been here by now.”
My husband could relate to Ray’s comment.
And me? I keep trying to change my habits, and I am starting to be more successful, but I realize it just takes one late arrival to undo months of being on-time.
