One of the blogger that I really love to read is Lindsay Ferrier of Suburban Turmoil. She is sarcastic and funny. But today, I read a post and at the end she asked, “Are you with me?” and I have to answer, “no.”

Admittedly, I don’t know a lot about what Lindsay was blogging about — that is, her post was the first I had heard about a web show by a porn mom, Mommy XXX. I know. I live under a rock. But Lindsay caught me up, and I get the idea. I should also note that I haven’t watched Mommy XXX, and I don’t plan to.

But Lindsay did, and she found out that Ritz Crackers and Jell-O were advertising during the show’s breaks. She indicated these were both products she used, and she didn’t want her money supporting the show. That’s when she asked if other moms were with her.

And I’m not. I like Ritz crackers and Jell-O, and you would find both (as well as other Nabisco products) in my kitchen cupboards. I am not going to eliminate them from my grocery list or write to the company and ask that the ads be pulled. Why would I? I’m not the target market for the ads, and I like the product regardless of where the company decides to advertise.

But I think the big reason I am not with her is that it goes against everything else that I do believe — that is, that I can have very strong beliefs, but I do not value my beliefs over the beliefs of others. I know what is right and wrong for me, but I do NOT know what is right and wrong for others (unless you are my child and then all bets are off).

To me, this is a basic belief. It is part of what it means to be free. It isn’t just my right to believe what I want to believe, but it is also your right to believe what you want to believe even (and especially then) when I don’t agree. I am a smart opinionated woman and mother, and I know that I want my daughters to read Judy Blume’s Forever, and I want to talk to my kids about books like The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, which always leads to the great discussion about the word “nigger” being in the book. You might not want the same things, which is why I don’t want you censoring my book choices or any other choice I make. Some people might be offended by either one of those books (both have been banned and/or censored).

Once we start inflicting our beliefs on others, what do we create? Where do we stop? Do we end up like China where access to the Internet is extremely controlled by the government? Or where our news had to be approved by the government?

I believe you have the same rights I do even when I don’t agree with you.

This is true right up to the time that your beliefs interfere with mine. Advertising food that I buy on a show that I don’t watch or support isn’t interfering with me. It doesn’t have anything to do with me, and I don’t see the money spent on advertising as being “my” money. If I did think of it as “my” money, I would be more concerned about what withdrawing my money would do to the worker that had nothing to do with the advertising but goes to work every day to make a good product and support his or her family. Would my lack of spending cost someone a job?

Would I watch a porn star raise her kids? No. But would you? I don’t know; I don’t care, and if you want to, it turns out you can.

Slight digression: I should also say that in the last week, on two separate occasions while out in public, I have unwilling viewed anatomically correct blow-up dolls. The first time was in a restaurant/bar where my husband and I were the only other patrons besides a bachelorette party of about 9 women. It was about 7 p.m., which was a little early to be breaking out the male-enhanced party favors. The second-time was last Saturday around 2 p.m. on the AuSable River. Again, it appeared to be a bachelorette party. When the group saw me in my canoe with my two kids (ages 12 and 10), one woman quickly threw a towel over the doll’s parts, but it was a little too late and did little since another person in the group had a large purple member sticking straight up from her head like a hat. My kids did see, and while I prefer they hadn’t, it did give me a chance to talk to both.

And in the case of the porn star mom, I would say it is an opportunity to discuss how much of reality is real. Should we judge another mom based on her public persona? Discuss.

While I don’t begrudge either group for having fun, I would say both groups were using bad judgment. Do I want to ban the sale of anatomically-correct blow up dolls? No. I just wish people would use better judgment, but I wish that about a lot of things. I did appreciate the attempt to cover up.